Dear First Year Teacher…
Reader, the following is intended to be an open letter that I’ve written to my past self as I’m getting ready to begin my first year of teaching. The process of writing this letter allowed me to deeply reflect on the growth I’ve experienced and reminded me of some important things as I get ready to head into my second year of teaching. Thank you for taking the time to read and I hope that my openness and vulnerability can encourage you to reach out to the “life-savers” in your life.
Dear Eric,
I know what you are feeling. You’re about to officially start living the dream of being a band director and you’re beyond excited to get to work, to give your best each day, and to inspire others through music. Lean into those feelings, and never forget it. You know that your greatest strengths are your energy and enthusiasm. The students will see them, they’ll laugh and think you’re a little weird but they will learn to love and feed off of them. This year will be difficult, but remember to lean into your reasons for getting into the profession.
I know the other emotions you’re feeling. The ones you aren’t open about or don’t want to fully admit. You’re afraid, filled with “what if’s” (“What if I’m not a good teacher?” “What if I am not prepared enough?” and the biggest - “What if I made a mistake in choosing to become a teacher?”). On top of all the "what if's", you're living in a new community and living by yourself for the first time. This new phase of life is entirely different than the last five years and the uncertainty is driving you insane. What will this year hold and can I survive it?
During new teacher orientation , your principal said, “The first year is not about keeping your head above the water, it’s about trying to keep your nose above it.” So many of the great teachers you have talked to have echoed this sentiment. These same teachers talked about how often they wanted to quit that first year. “That couldn’t possibly be me,” you thought, “I know this will be hard, but I can’t imagine wanting to give this up…” Boy, we were wrong about that.
The school year is going to be a long journey. It will feature some of the greatest moments of your life, but also your lowest. It won’t be long until you start struggling in the water. We dove headfirst into the school year , but as time went by, we started slowing down. The water level starts to rise. Your head starts dipping below and you feel as if you are drowning. Sure, you get those gasps of air, the wonderful relief of time spent on the podium, teaching band and making music. But you start dreading each day, not sure if you can keep up the fight of treading water. You forget about taking care of yourself, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Then the waves start crashing down. There will be a time when the thought of going to school each day will upset your stomach and cause you to panic. Afraid of fighting to survive another day, spending hours asking friends what to do and even going as far as looking to find a career other than teaching. Giving up on the dream you’ve had because you don’t know if you can keep it up without falling apart.
In this time, I learned something important. The battle to keep my nose above water was not one I was supposed to do on my own. Eventually, every single one of us will lose that battle, no matter your level of experience, what you teach,or how much you believe in this being your dream. To keep from drowning you need to find the “lifesavers” in your life. A “lifesaver” is a floatation device to help someone in water stay afloat. For a lifesaver to serve its function, you have to reach for it and accept it when it comes to you.
The “lifesavers” in your life were always around you. Former teachers, friends, and colleagues. Admitting that you needed them was difficult. It's hard being vulnerable and admitting that you were not strong enough to do this on your own. I am so proud of you for swallowing that pride and reaching out to grab those lifesavers. Without them, you never would have made it.
I’m not suggesting that it will get easier, in fact you will face tougher tests as the year finishes and will face similar challenges in the years to come. However, you are no longer on your own. Your lifesavers will not let you drown, even in rough waters.
The best piece of advice I can offer for this first year of teaching is find your lifesavers and use them. You cannot do this alone. Keep in touch with your friends, they will always be a voice of support. Give yourself grace. You won’t be perfect, and you will never be perfect - that’s okay, no one expects you to be. Relationships first, content second. The students won’t always remember their major scales perfectly, but they’ll always remember how you made them feel. Find time for yourself, read a book, spend time with friends, enjoy nature and don’t forget to eat well and exercise. Finally, go back to those first feelings, the excitement and energy that you have and know that being a band director is the best decision you have made. Get ready to dive on in and don’t forget a lifesaver.
Mr. Tinkler
If you are getting ready to start your first year, know that I believe in you, the people around you believe in you, and that you got this! Find your “lifesavers” and admit that you need them to keep your nose above that water. Remember why you chose to teach. Give yourself plenty of grace, and take a break from work every once in a while. This profession is not easy but it is so very worth it.
If you want to hear a bit more about my first year teaching, the struggles and the highlights, please check out the podcast I co-host and produce with Dr. Phillip Payne, Not Your Forte. The episode is titled “First Year Breakdown” and you can find that and other episodes centered around music education wherever podcasts are available. Don’t be afraid to reach out if you have any questions, or would like to share your stories about music education, no matter your age or experience. You can find my contact information and additional information on my website: https://www.erictinkler-musiceducation.com/
Before wrapping up, I want to give a huge thank you to the people in my life who are my “life-savers”
Daniela, you are the best co-director I could ask for. You have taught me so much and I know that you will always support me as a teacher and as a person.
Abigail and Michelle, your patience, and your understanding of the situation I was in, proved to be a key in helping me get back on track and knowing that the struggle was okay.
My former college professors, who were a constant resource that I was able to reach out to and helped me whenever I needed it.
There are so many more that I could list here, but know that each of you have had a major impact on my life and I am still a teacher because of you.
**I originally wrote this letter as I was preparing for my second year of teaching, but never got around to finalizing the edits and sharing with the world. I am now over halfway through year two and going strong! There are still ups and downs, but I am glad I’ve stuck with teaching and want to let everyone know that it does get better!**